Loss of identiy

As I approach my final term of training, and with over 100 client hours, certain themes have consistently emerged in the work. I’ve been calling them Held, Not Spoken.

The fourth theme is the loss of identity. This doesn’t always present in obvious ways. It can develop through relationships, where over time we adapt and accommodate, slowly moving away from ourselves. It can show up through misaligned career paths, health challenges, addiction, or experiences of abuse; where something internal has had to quieten in order to cope.

What I’ve come to notice is how devoted we can become to external validation. How easily our focus shifts outward; onto others, expectations and the roles we feel we need to fulfil. In that shift, the gap between who we are and how we are living can widen.

Our values, beliefs and sense of meaning can begin to blur. The internal gaze softens and the blueprint of self becomes harder to access. What has stood out just as strongly is the way this can rebuild. Not through dramatic moments but gradual growth. Through being met, being heard and having a space where nothing needs to be performed or proven.

I’ve been part of many individual journeys where that connection to self begins to re-emerge. A quiet return to self-worth, self-honouring and agency. For many, it’s the first time they’ve allowed themselves the space to reconnect and it doesn’t look like becoming someone new; it’s gently inviting a return to self.

You can download the full reflection here:
https://canva.link/meetingyourself